What if she comes early?
Where will the shower gifts go until we have furniture?
Why do I have to pee every five minutes?
Why is there so much pressure down there?
What if I can't shave my legs when it's "go" time?
What if I have post-partum?
What if I have pre-partum?
What if she is colicky?
What if Ella's allergic to the dogs?
What if I have a terrible labor?
What will my rash look like when I'm done giving birth?
What if all Buzz and I do after we have the baby is fight?
What if she's funny looking?
What if we have to live in our townhouse forever?
What if I still don't understand the whole breastfeeding thing - even after taking 3, 2 hour classes?
What if I can't get all of my end of the year school stuff done before I leave?
What if we don't find a glider soon?
What if I don't have a job next year?
What if we can't afford daycare?
As you can see, a lot of these questions are ridiculous. Although some are not.
I thought Zoloft was supposed to take away all of these annoying questions and minor freak-outs. I know this isn't my typical, semi-amusing post but I had to get this junk off my mind. Now please, don't you all go calling to check on me!!! I'll be fine.
9 comments:
Kelly -
Honestly, this is something we all go through. You are experiencing some major changes in your life right now with your body, your hormones, your home space (loosing your doggie bonding room), your lifestyle. And all that just in anticipation of an ever bigger adjustment.
Its hard for Buzz to relate/understand because he wont really get a clue of what's coming until Ella's here. He's been living the last few months just as he always has (all the guys do). You, on the other hand, get 10 months to internalize and experience. Lucky you!
So its a lot to take in. Now, combine all that with the other rare pregnancy symptoms you've been dealt and the longest, coldest winter ever and you are where you're at today.
Everything is how its supposed to be and in the end all will work out just fine. I'm sure of it.
Well said Jessica, all of it is very true. I myself had all the same thoughts. Relax today and do a little online shopping.
I am pretty sure nothing I could say would make you feel better; I can't relate to the experience, but I could imagine how stressful it is. I just want to remind you that I love you, and I believe everything is going to be great! Hang in there!
Kelly,
You should HEARD the things people said to me. Many people are very ignorant when speaking to a pregnant woman. I got the 'you're so small' for awhile and it totally freaked me out like you. Then it turned into, 'you're so HUGE'. So no worries. You are moving along perfectly. Your docs can attest to that. Your hormones are flying off the charts and your tired because you have all this extra weight to carry around. Seriously, that is exhausting. Try to ease your mind with a bubble bath, don't listen to anyone's bullshit, go get a massage. This is all normal...it's just too much when people say things they shoudn't. About the furniture....don't worry, the little one may be in a bassinet for awhile anyhow. Or you could have curry smelling furniture like I did...LOL - HA! That was so weird...anyhoo, do worry too much ..that's extra stress. It will all be GREAT!
Kelly- I know what your going throug...just know...somehow - someway...things always have a way of working out.
It's very normal to feel incredibly overwhelmed. Oh, and if the crib doesn't arrive on time you will have a pack n play for her to sleep in. No worries, hang in there. :)
Kelly,
Jess C. said it soo well. And, Zoloft doesn't make it all go away. It will help afterwards, but you are so full of hormones when you are pregnant, and you aren't sleeping good so nothing the pills won't solve it- I know that from experience. Post partum may or may not happen, but you have your doctors on your side and are aware of your pre-dispositions so you are ahead of the game there. All the rest are fears I had, so I feel for you! Go ahead and sleep when you want, cry when you want, and eat what you want. You are doing the most amazing thing the human body can do. And tell Buzz to smile and rub your feet. (not that Mike rubbed mine, but a girl's gotta try).
I'd say hang in there, but I wanted to punch people when they told me that. Go eat something yummy! Your baby will be gorgeous!!!
Not much left to say that hasn't already been said. Bottom line: welcome to the club. I had all of those same crazy thoughts so I guess you can find comfort in the fact that it's "normal". And even though all of that stuff sounds terrible, it's totally worth it in the end. Yes, you and Buzz will fight, probably more than you ever thought possible - but you guys have a strong relationship and as long as you know that going in, you'll be just fine.
I know it seems like you're standing at the bottom of the hugest mountain looking up right now and you cannot seem to picture yourself making it to the other side, but the crazy thing is, one day you'll just wake up over there and you'll barely remember the climb. I'm here if you need me.
You are NORMAL! Thank god your "small"! It will change and then you will wish everyone was saying...OMG you're TINY!...
2nd, we are STILL waiting for the rest of our furniture... and the baby doesn't care..only the mommies. She won't need the stuff right away anyway. It's just nice for us to get shit put away.
3rd, I TOTALLY understand about the calling in to sleep! It is SUPER hard when you are a teacher. The kids are SO draining!
Kelly, don't feel bad, nothing is wrong with you, buzz will understand that first week when that baby is up at 2am, 3am, 5 am...then you can just sit there with a smile on your face with that "I told you so look!"
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